Monday, January 9, 2012

Light vs. Dark

I was reading through my friends post and I happen to come across a post that read, "I'm Proud to be Dark-skinned, you Light-Skinned hoes ain't got nothing on me." At first I giggled, said "wow" and moved on but the woman in me, I just had to comment, it was very friendly and nonchalant but as my day drew on ...it kind of made me feel a certain way. I went back to read the other comments posted and there was a negative notation to one of her comments, and it got me thinking...are we still so insecure within ourselves that we have to lash out at others who are different. Society's view of what is better and prettier have certainly affected us as a whole, I just happen to be light-skinned and I'm wondering if all dark-skin women feel the same way as my FB friend. There was nothing wrong with her post, it's the way she felt at the moment and there is nothing wrong with celebrating who you are....why wouldn't you, you have no other choice other than to accept your dark-skin, embrace it and love it. As we all should no matter how light or dark our skin is. Did someone make her feel bad about her beautiful dark hue or was she just being petty and mean? Either way she was totally expressing a view that is held by millions of people that live amongst us.

I have never let society determine for me what was beautiful, accepting or good, I made those decisions on my own, how could I not love my Grandmother Sue who is of the darkest hue, beautiful within her own right, the strength of her character and the love that poured from her heart is bigger than any thoughts that I have on what I should feel about color. Or my Grandmother Lula who was light skinned, strong and real, should I love any one of them less for being born a certain shade of BLACK. Because no matter how light or dark your skin is....BLACK is the word that you must come to terms with.

Having ill feelings towards a single individual because they have wronged you or the two of you just don't get on is very different from crowding one shade of BLACK together and making statements about them that isn't true. I hate the stereotypes that come along with the shades of color, Light skinned girls are stuck up. Dark skinned girls are mean. Being born a particular shade of BLACK doesn't determine your character, I don't fit into none of those stupid stereotypes, I am one of the most down to earth women you'll run across...so what steps can we take to ensure that our little ones growing up don't fall into the trap that society has left for them. And I'm sure some of my dark hue sisters will say, that I don't understand because I'm of a lighter shade but I don't care what someone's personal choice is, if a man doesn't like light skinned women oh well, move on to the next and if a man doesn't light dark-skinned women same choice....who cares. I will say that women allow men to create insecurities where there should be NONE. No matter the shade of your color if you allow a man to tell you what he likes before he even gets to know YOU then there is a problem. If he can't see beyond a shade of color then that's not the person for you, everybody has their own preferences, again nothing wrong with that but they are the ones missing out by choosing people based on shades of color. I, myself is guilty of saying, "Damn, I love a chocolate man", that's a person preference, but I don't exclude men of other shades, a man is a man is a man....no matter what shade he is and I am experienced to know that.

So the next time I come across a post that is celebrating a person for who she is, I will think twice before I conclude the reasoning behind the statement. Who knows what experiences this person may have encountered? Just know that there are millions of women like me who love you no matter what shade of BLACK you are