Question: Why is it that the happier you get the more scared you become? Whether it is in your personal or professional realm, I notice that the happier I get the more I act out as though I don't deserve it; but I know I do! Logically this makes no sense to me. How can I know something and still feel the complete opposite? This is where one needs to take a deep look into themselves and understand the reasons, and acknowledge the insecurities. Insecurities go deep into a person's psyche. It may take you years to understand why you feel uncomfortable about things, but you must first recognize those feelings & actions, and see how they relate to your life NOW; not how they made you feel in the past. We are all connected mentally and emotionally to our past. Whether it was an absent father or an unfaithful partner, those things helped us to develop a pattern (good or bad) as to how we relate and, or react to things. Although those bad patterns exist, they can be changed if dealt with properly. For sometime now I have been trying to understand why people, including myself, sabotage their happiness. It is not a thought process because if I really thought before I did a lot of things...those actions would never occur. It is all about growing up and taking responsibility for yourself...your actions, your feelings, your worth. I am great at a lot of things but I realize the things I need to work on as well. Will I ever be great at those things? Yes, in time I will. Where do you make the conversion of just saying and wanting and actually doing? Things like this do not happen overnight, and I would be fooling myself, as well as others if I say that tomorrow I won't have some of the feelings that make me react in negative ways. I can say that I will move toward making tomorrow a day that I do something positive to counteract the negative feelings. When I feel the negativity I will ask myself why. Being totally honest with myself and owning it. I would love to know your opinions to the question I asked at the beginning, "Why is it that the happier you get the more scared you become?"

Keep Striving, Disappointments are the tools of life...they define you.

Good Morning my loves, When striving for success you will encounter disappointment often, don’t let it deter you from your goal, stay the course and understand that falling down or failing isn’t the problem…it is what you do next that determine your character. That sets the tone for how you will steer your course in life. I have a goal set in mind, I have aspirations and dreams, I focused on this one particular goal and although I don’t have it now doesn’t mean that I will not have it soon or even later. I allowed the way I feel about this particular situation affect me mentally, and physically, it was not intended…just kind of happened. I prayed about it and even now as I type this I realize that I didn’t let those bad feelings go…not until about a couple hours ago. I release all that negative energy I was holding because things weren’t or haven’t gone my way. I embrace what God has for me, my faith is strong, my heart and arms are open to receive. I know that I am worthy and if what I am pursing doesn’t happen right now, I know it will happen soon. Don’t give up on your goals just because you get a no, go through the motions, remember who you are and keep it moving. Talk with a friend or mentor, pray and understand that a no is not the end, it may be that great beginning that you need. Go hard, be fair and know your worth.

We Lose Before We Even Start To Fight....(this way)

The idea that George Zimmerman is even mentioned or thought of to fight with anyone in the format of making money off his name turns my stomach, the only reason he is known world wide is because he KILLED, MURDERED a young boy that was minding his own business. Because Trayvon Martin was black Zimmerman decided in his racist mind that Trayvon was up to no good, he took it upon himself to follow him even when the police asked him not too. WOULD I LOVE TO SEE HIM GET HIS ASSED WHOOPED? HELL YEAH. I WOULD LOVE TO SEE HIM GET RUN OVER BY A BUS OR TRAIN, I WOULDN’T PISS ON IF HE WAS ON FIRE! Would I pay to see a farce, in a ruled and regulated venue that would be televised and generate millions of dollars that he would get a percentage of, HELL NO!!! How would that make me feel better to know that he got knocked down a few times by a celebrity (nothing against Game but really)…where there will be a referee to make sure he didn’t get hurt. Where was the referee that night? Someone said that millions of black people would pay to see this kind of event, and this is exactly what they are counting on, you paying! If you haven’t noticed that is all you ever do anyway. Trayvon’s mother and father still grieves the lost of their child, they can no longer hug him, or say to him I love you. They can’t wish him well or look forward to his bright future because he is dead. And now because Zimmerman says that he will participate in a boxing match (who cares if it’s for charity) this is suppose to be some kind of retribution, really? As a mother and a black woman that doesn’t give me any solace. It doesn’t make me feel good at all. Do you really think he is going to take a whooping? While you get excited and pay money to see a boxing match that means nothing Trayvon’s family will still be grieving his death. I think the whole thing is fake or atleaset I pray that it is.

Everything is Everything!

Good Morning my love's,
Today is Thursday, January 30, 2014, how the hell are you?  What's going on with you today?  Staying positive I hope.  How are you feeling about life, work and career, family, love, friends and getting that money right?  What are your goals for today?  It's 11:11am has anything interesting happened to you as of yet?  Let's chat a min.

My day is going very well, got to work, had breakfast and now I'm drinking one of the best cups of coffee ever, catching up on some tasks and going through my emails.  I'm about to respond to a few emails I received asking for a bit of advice.  And NO, I don't even pretend to know it all but I am a woman of this world Damnit...full of experiences.... good and bad(lol).  I'm actually excited about a few...good stuff and a little naughty.  So I'm off...duty calls...enjoy your day!

Co-Parenting

Co-Parenting:

When you sleep with someone and it results in a pregnancy ...both of you are responsible.  Men and women deciding to become parents even if you don't love one another, even if that's not your boyfriend/girlfriend...understand...that should not get in the way of raising a beautiful, healthy child who will contribute positively to society.  These are decisions that you made willingly...remember that!!!

Men...when a woman tells you she is pregnant and you know you've been smashing without any protection...stop acting all crazy...prepare your mind and communicate with the woman.  That is not to time to revert back into a lil boy.  You had an option to put on a condom, it's your dick...wrap it up!!! Even if she's not your girl or just some girl you had sex with for the first time and only one time...stop acting like you don't understand how things go down. Discuss your options and get a clear understanding of how the three of you are going forward.

Women: when you get pregnant by a man who you are just sleeping with and you guys are not in a relationship...stop romanticizing it....because the truth of the matter is that...you guys had sex and now you're pregnant...NOT...you guys had sex, you got pregnant and now you are a couple.  Communicate with this man so that he can be there with you through the pregnancy, delivery and the rest of the child's life.  Don't make it difficult for a man to be a father just because that man isn't your man.  Do you feel me?

As a child grows up whether you are with their mother or not, if you make a child feel love, care and support them as you should your relationship will be as it should.  A child will never forget how you treated their mother...and they will never respect you as a man if you are disrespectful to their mother.  You don't have to be together, you don't have to act as though you are all in love...if that is not the case...but as an adult, you should be mature enough to foster a positive relationship with the person who you gave your body to.  Get over yourself...
SMH...

Life experiences....
Life Lessons....
Pass them on!!!

You vs. The Economy

How are you fairing in this economy?  Are you making the best of your earnings?  Remember to pay yourself first by participating in your company's retirement plan (401k, etc.), transit deductions and health care incentives that are taken out of your earnings pre-tax.  Research the best way to make what you earn work for you and your family.  As the tax season is upon us, be mindful to SAVE some of that money, don't let it burn your pockets...put it in a CD, research which bank offers the best rates.   Check your W-2's to ensure that you are making the right allocations.  Know what tax brackets you are in to ensure the right amount of taxes are coming out of your earning.  Consult an accountant or your HR department for help.  Invest in stocks, once again you must do your own research.  Help and pay yourself first!!!

MONEY TIP: If you can not put more money into your retirement plan, commit to a certain amount that you will save every pay period.  Once you get to $1,000 research CD's.  (Stack and be consistent)

Questions while dating?

What are the major questions that need to be discussed before getting into a serious relationship?  And when should they be discussed?  If you are just dating do you feel obligated to tell them your secrets or do you feel that the length of time you are together determines how much you tell them?

Are you afraid of asking the really hared questions or do you get so caught up in the moment that you allow them to get away from you.  Let's chat?